“I mean…”

“Honestly…”

“No lie!”

I am attempting to remove such sayings from my vocabulary. Should i have to qualify my statements by assuring my partner in conversation that i am not lying? I don’t think so. Truth should be the standard. If i don’t feel certain of it’s truth, then i shouldn’t say it.

“Believe me when i say…”

“For real!”

“No joke!”

“I am NOT kidding!”

Those i speak with should be able to trust me that i am sharing only what i believe to be true. I shouldn’t have to convince them of this with other words: it should be self-evident. It’s not that they must believe that i am right about everything. I will inevitably be wrong about things. But, in order for us to have meaningful dialog we have to be able to trust each other to be honest about our convictions. If i can’t be trusted to speak what i mean, then i shouldn’t be spoken to.

I feel like when i use these terms i am communicating a standard of falsehood: “Unless i say, ‘honestly’ you can assume that i’m being dishonest!” I hope to have such integrity with my words that all i have to do is make a statement and the hearer will have confidence that i am saying what i understand to be true. So, here’s a step in that direction. Stop me if you hear me use one of those phrases, okay?